|
|
Good Shepherd Lutheran Church Today's Frontline Devotion Sunday, February 29, 2004 Whatever You Ask |
A daily |
Frontline Devotion for Sunday, February 29, 2004, By Anne B. Crawford
Text for the Day:
John 14:13-14
On of the Lenten disciplines our congregation is focusing on this year is the
discipline of prayer. As I reflected on prayer in preparing to write this
devotion, one of my first thoughts was what could I possibly say about prayer
that hasn’t already been said and probably said better and more eloquently than
any words I could offer. Nevertheless, I was preparing to write a devotion
about listening in prayer, until I went to choir practice last night.
The devotion at last night’s practice was about prayer, specifically about
answered prayer and the many places in the Bible where God promises that
whatever we ask in His name, he will do it. Those are wonderful words, but when
the choir member leading the devotion asked us for a show of hands of who
believes this promise, my hand didn’t go up. I wanted my hand to go up, but
rather than bring me comfort, those words of scripture about the power of prayer
bring up a painful prayer memory that nearly 20 years later, for me is still
unresolved.
My father passed away 19 years ago this March, at the age of 59. I was living
in Madison, WI at the time, and my parents and sisters all lived in Minneapolis.
Right around Christmastime, my father, a normally pretty upbeat guy, started
having pains in his foot. When he finally went to the doctors out at the VA
hospital about his foot (he and my mom didn’t have any private medical
insurance), they discovered in the course of their examination that he had lung
cancer (he was a longtime smoker). So began the slow nightmare of my father’s 2
and ½ month struggle with cancer and a gangrenous foot. Over the course of
those 2 and ½ months I prayed like I had never prayed before, searching for the
right words, the right emotions, the right ‘everything’ and ‘anything’ in my
prayers to ask God to heal my father. I didn’t want him to die (and certainly
not to die so young and in such pain). I don’t know as I consciously tried
bargaining with God in prayer, but somewhere in the back of my mind I know I was
probably bargaining with myself that if God would heal my dad, I’d be a better
Christian, I’d pray more often, I’d read my Bible more, and I would be really,
really grateful.
But at the end of those 2 and ½ months, my father passed away, having spent the
last two weeks of his life in a VA hospital, hooked up to a respirator so that
he was unable to speak or communicate well with his family. My prayers had not
been answered – at least not answered the way I asked God to answer them. I
didn’t ‘blame’ God for my father’s death, and yet God had not answered my
prayers and given me what I asked for. My conclusion at the time was I must
have been asking for the wrong thing (or asking in the wrong way – even then I
wanted to exercise ‘control’ over God’s response to my prayers, making His
response dependent on my ability to be eloquent or persuasive enough). That
experience sadly has altered how I pray to God. I am skittish about putting God
to the test in prayer. I add qualifiers in my prayers for the really important
things, so that whatever the outcome, I can’t say God has refused my request.
And that is where I need to start my reflections on prayer this Lenten season.
What limitations have I placed on God by refusing to be honest about my true
desires and needs? Who do I think I’m fooling? Is prayer only valid if I get
exactly what I ask for? How do I reconcile scripture that tells me whatever I
ask in Jesus’ name, He will do, with the knowledge that I’m sure I often ask for
the wrong things (things that aren’t good for my spiritual health and
well-being)? I start this journey not with answers, but with lots of questions. What questions do you have about your prayer life? Whatever they are, now is
a good time for reflection and examination.
Let us pray: Heavenly Father, you promise to hear us in prayer and grant what
we ask in your name. It sounds so simple, but sin makes it complicated. Open
our hearts in prayer to be honest, and humble and to seek your answers rather
than just our own desires. Amen.
 |
All are welcome to join and share in our Devotional Ministry on the "Frontlines" of the world. Frontline Devotions are sent via email daily. Sign up by clicking on the box to the left. Pastor Dave welcomes feedback. Contact him at pastordave@goodshepherdonline.org. |
Visit the |